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This extensive write-up from the efforts of Blair Rhodes!

"How sharper than a serpent's tooth it is
To have an ungrateful child."
King Lear, Act I, Scene iv.

On this particular Thursday night, Exeter cemetary sits cloaked in a special Old World sort of darkness not often found on the American shores. Clad in black, a lone, lonely Slayer runs through the darkness, custom pockets stuffed with equipment. Her young eyes are strangely cold as she pushes herself onwards with steely determination. She rounds a cluster of tombstones and sees a figure ahead. It's searching the graves with a flashlight, making no effort to at concealment. Candy slows right down, and suddenly wears a beam of light in her face. "What is it?" asks a young man's nervous voice. "Who's there?"
"Ow!" she exclaims, raising a gloved hand. "That's- that's right in my eyes...!"
"Sorry," the figure apologises. With the flashlight lowered, Candy's vision quickly re-adjusts. She recognises the figure as Josh, the young man she retrieved from this site after Goomer's firebomb attack.
Behind a conveniently nearby large tombstone, two burly unkempt vamps study the scene.
"G'wan, Fugsby, we've been followin' 'im fer arf 'n ow-ahr! You get 'im!" one urges, his lattice work of safety pin chains jingling in the cool night air.
"You aht a your mind, Verklempt?!" Thugsby snarls back. The legacy stains on his denim jacket obscure the punk manifestos written thereon in biro. "NAHbody's stupid enough t' walk around 'ere at night waving a torch around like 'at! It's gotta be a trap! E's crazy! Crazy like a fox!" Thugsby drills a filthy finger against his temple in emphasis.
"Um, are you sure you should be out here?" Candy asks the not-so-intrepid investigator.
"Oh, I'm looking for my wallet," he explains. "I'm pretty sure it got left here." His brow furrows. "We-we met earlier, right?" he asks. Candy re-introduces herself. Josh grins. "Yeah, I was looking at the vampire graves over there..." The flashlight beam reaches away into the darkness, then returns. "Pretty cool."
Candy is trys to subtly convince Josh to leave the graveyard. "Are you sure your wallet wasn't stolen?"
Josh snorts. "Things like that don't happen in a small town like this!"
"Hey, don't be too sure about that," Candy shakes her head. "My room was firebombed last week!"
Thugsby wipes his nose with the back of his leather-clad hand. He glances up at Verklempt. "Looks like there's one each, nah. Why you got the 'ump? I fort you woz 'ungry?"
Verklempt sucks his teeth: "Nah, I et a cheerleader earlier, dinn' I?" His cracked lips smack at the memory of the fresh, warm neck-nectar.
Candy's Slayer persuasion skills appear to be on the wane. "I can help you look," she offers. "It's not like I have to BE anywhere..."
"I like this town," Josh confides, beam flailing over the damp grass. "People are actually nice..."
Verklempt nudges his colleague. "Go orn, get 'em!" he snarls. "Wot are you, man or meese?"
"Like that Lex Madsen guy," Josh blithely continues. "I'm gonna look at his private collection!" His excited grin glints in the torchlight.
Candy scuffs her shoe in the grass, hoping that she'll find something to convince the young man to leave the danger zone. "Yeah, his son Nick goes to my school."
In the cramped conditions behind the tombstone, a war of wills is escalating between the two vamps. "Go orn!" Verklempt hisses in his comrade's ear. "Go orn! Ere, you goin' soft since ol' Goome' bought it?"
The two unsuspecting warmbloods continue to search the immediate area, Josh cheerfully chatting away. "Lex's been good to me. I was thinking of asking him for board."
Candy shakes her head again. "I don't know about that. He's a pretty private person."
She wonders how hard it can be to just find something on the ground with her Slayer senses.
Meanwhile, Verklempt's needling has penetrated Thugsby's patience, and his dander rises. "Oright, ah will!"
"Oright, then!" Verklempt acknowledges.
"Oright!" Thugsby readies himself, discretely cracking his knuckles and checking the wind - that sort of thing.
"You think he's a wallet-stealer?" Josh asks.
Candy is neither impressed nor convinced. "Er, I don't think he needs the money."
Josh shrugs, then grins. "Well, I think Lex Madsen and I are gonna get on just fine...!"
Candy tries to bite back her cynicism. "Yeah... I can see THAT happening..."
Nearby, death slips its leash and comes down like a wolf on the fold. Thugsby coils like a denim and leather clad punk vamp, the demon raging in his eyes as he tenses to spring -
then recoils, gasping in horror.
"'Ang abaht... i'n't that the Slayer?!"

OPENING CREDITS

ACT ONE
It's opening night at the Madsen Gallery for Emerging Artistes, with the cream of Exeter's crop milling and flowing around the crisp, neo-Roman interior, quaffing imported champagne and nibbling on salmon pinwheels. Lex Madsen holds court, standing on the centre of a Byzantine-esqu faux-marble sunburst mosaic, impeccable in a handmade suit that cost the entire weekly wages of Lesotho. Cass, Candy and Brian are amongst the guests. They listen as Lex winds up his speech. "... and that's why it's a great honour to be supporting such up-and-coming artists as Bret Ackerman, and provide a platform on which he can exhibit his emerging talents."
Cass evenly appraises the self-made magnate; she's resplendant in long grey shorts and kitten heels, a wraparound black top neatly bisected by an obi. "Who's he?"
"Oh, that's Lex Madsen," Candy explains. By comparison, the Slayer looks very nondescript in a simple sundress. "He's rich. He tried to hire me, but then I found out he was trying to exterminate the supernatural in Exeter."
Who should appear in their line of sight but the emerging artist himself, looking very Bob Geldof in a natty suit, his otherwise stringy hair pulled back into a ponytail. Evidence is that he's scrubbed up well. Rather shyly, he greets them.
"Hi, yeah," Candy breezes. "Um, this is my stepfather, Brian." Brian greets the young artist and shakes his hand. "And this is Cass..." Cass coldly appraises Bret, and begins to verbally dissect him.
"Let's go over here, shall we?" Brian suggests, hooking Cass' arm and attempts to discreetly escort her away from the couple. Cass isn't having a bar of being interrupted.
"Please don't touch me, Mister Stevens...!" Cass commands imperially.
"Over here is ... very interesting," Brian continues unconvincingly. "Look, here's a corner..." which they go towards ... and their jaws drop simultaneously in a weird but great visual.
Meanwhile, Bret is looking anxious as he speaks with Candy. "So...what do you think???"
Candy replies "Oh yes, it's all very nice" and Bret is instantly relieved. Candy realises something is up but before she can investigate, Bret invites her to a small after-party. He takes the oppertunity to put his hand gently on the small of her back; Candy visibly flinches at the young man's touch, not entirely used to people touching her who aren't trying to drive fangs or talons into her. "I'm- I'm gonna do some... stuff later... with Cass," Candy explains.
"Oh, well, she's welcome to come too," he invites magnanimously.
Candy can't quite meet his gaze. "Um... no."
He wasn't expecting that one; Bret is visibly deflated by Candy's refusal. She sees Brian and Cass standing near a corner - whatever's around it has got them pinned in their tracks, looking shocked. Candy siezes the chance to go, and excuses herself from Bret to join them. "Hey, guys, what's -" and her jaw drops also.
Around the corner, plain as day for all to see, waist-height to ceiling, is a giant portait shot of Candy. "I'm... very... big," is all the Slayer can make of the situation. The trio stand gazing upwards in awe and trepidation.
Cass finds her voice (never far away). "You're his Mona Lisa!" Candy just gapes so Cass keeps going. "You know, your eyeball is as big as my head..."
"Well, I've always said so," smirks Zak, making his presence known.
Candy backs away slightly from the odd sight of a huge vision of her head, and bumps into someone with a subtle rustle of pure Egyptian cotten. She turns to apologise and Lex Madsen grins down at her. "I'm big..." is all the Slayer can manage.
"Domineering without being gauche - how very you," Lex grins. "Brian, how are things?" He extends an impeccably manicured hand. Brian shakes hands with the man he once regarded as the Devil incarnate.
"Things are splendid." He allows himself a smile.
Candy lowers her head and exits the gallery, walking a little too quickly. Zak follows his step-sister outside.
Cass tears her gaze away from the giant hypnotic idol on the wall to see Troy appear before Lollie, hand her a small square of paper, and disappear. Lollie sees it depicts a handrawn loveheart, with she and Troy locked in proto-Goth matrimony inside its gilt-edged borders - a very "My Chemical Romance"/"Panic! At The Disco" type of love note. Lollie comes over to Cass. "Troy gave me this," she explains.
"That's nice," Cass sarks. "Look at THIS!" She indicates the giant picture.
Lollie is taken aback. "Why- why's it so creepy?" she asks in a small voice.
Outside the gallery, Candy sits alone on a park bench, arms crossed. Her foot taps out an idle rhythm as she marshalls her thoughts, feelings whirling inside her. She notices some random guy walking towards the gallery. He comes closer, partly shrouded in the dim evening light: Candy recognises the familiar features of Nick Madsen. She pointedly looks away, but not before he sees her look away, and stops. He looks a little awkward... then enters the gallery.
Candy looks up to see Zak standing there. "Did you know he was...?" he indicates the gallery.
"Not exactly..."
"How's it feel?"
The Slayer hugs herself a little harder. "What do YOU think?"
"He must, uhm, LIKE... y'know," Zak offers by way of insight.
She looks away, breeze blowing her hair across her anxious face. "Yeah..."
Inside the gallery, Cynth witnessed Candy's sudden departure. She's about to follow, when she's stopped by Nick. "Hey, uh, have you seen Petra?"
Cynth scans the crowd. "Yeah, she's over there. She's dressed up nice." Nick thanks her and goes to greet Petra.
"what's the deal with him and Candy?" Cass asks.
"Uhm... they almost went out," Cynth sums it up in a nutshell.
Cass nods, her mind on somthing esle. She glances back at the huge picture, then sideways at her friend. "She didn't sign anything, did she?" Before Cynth can answer, Cass strides purposefully towards Bret.
Beneath the giant portrait, a gormless friend of Max's drools upwards. "She's HOT...!"
"Easy, son, that's my step-daughter!" Brian bristles. "How old are you, fourteen? Want to see fifteen?" Before he can execute justice, he's aware of a certain presence. "Brian, I wonder if I might have a word?" Those oily tones once tempted Brian to near-madness. It's Madsen the Elder, offering a catch-up meeting. <
Brian decides to step up. "Yes. Let's do lunch!"
Outside, Candy txts away on her phone, biting her lip.
Inside, Cass is verbally eviscerating Bret. "Take that image down. It's being used without permission, and you are open to court action!"
Bret is utterly nonplussed, and backpedals before the onlsaught. "Look, ... I-I don't know what the problem is," he wheedles, spreading his hands. "I'm just putting on an exhibition here. I'm not some kind of monster!" His cellphone suddenly beeps, and he greatfully dives on it. As he reads the message, his eyes widen in horror.
Cass presses ahead stabbing at him with her pointed finger. "You will have that picture down in an hour, and I advise you not to contact Candy!"
Bret doesn't hear her, as his legs cross and he slowly crumples to the ground like the proverbial marionette with its strings cut. The young artist sits cross-legged on the gallery floor, his head in his hands. His cellphone clatters from his limp hand. Troy helpfully picks it up.
" 'Thanx 4 invite',' he reads aloud. " 'Pic was compliment. We shld b friends.'" He looks down at the fallen artist. "Dude, you got BURNED!" Troy examines the phone. "Hey! How'd you get it to come up with her picture?"
Outside, Candy yanks off her high heels, then rises from the bench. ""Look after these," she says, handing the shoes to Zak. "Tell Brian I'm gonna run home." Without waiting for a reply, she turns and jogs away. Candy's set expression betrays no emotion, her pace increasing to a steady run as the breeze pulls at her hair.
While trying to keep people from ogling his step-daughter, Brian finds himself approached by Madsen the Younger. "Unh, Mister Stevens?" Something is obviously troubling Nick, and it's partly that he feels he shouldn't be talking to Brian. He asks Brian to pass on a message to Candy, as she's into investigating all that "supernatural stuff": Lex is worried about something. "... and when my father's worried, YOU should be worried," Nick finishes ominously.
Brian nods sagely, wondering what fresh fly in the ointment this might be. "Thank you, Nick, I'll pass that on."
Nick takes the oppertunity to introduce Petra. Cass appears beside Brian. Nick introduces himself and Petra. She looks a little imtimidated as Cass runs her up and down with her eagle eye. "Nice dress," Cass nods.
"Is it really?" She looks self-conscious. "I borrowed it from my older sister," she confides to Cass. "It's not too old?"
"No, it's a classic look, and you wear it well." Cass seems genuinely impressed at Petra's choice of garment. Nick steers her away from the duo.
Cass stares up at Brian. "Candy's running home," she announces.
Brian rubs his chin. "Why would that be?" His brain works at the speed of an American intellectual.
"She didn't give permission for that giant photo."
"Yes," Cass nods patronisingly. Brian doesn't notice.
"So she would have been upset..."
"Yes..."
"Which is why she left early."
"You AMAZE me!" Cass sarks.
Nearby, Zak pats the devastated Bret on the shoulder. "Believe me, man, you're better off."


ACT TWO
At high noon the next day, Brian and Lex sit opposite each other at a small granite-topped table in the museum atrium. Around them, happy families bustle backwards and forwards, and the East Coast sunshine streams in through the skylight, like the tender fingers of God. Like spices at an Arabian market, little bowls of dips are arranged on the table between the two men. Brian leans foward, happily munching away on breadsticks, while Lex leans back, chewing conservatively on fresh bread. They discuss the most recent staff turnover at Exeter High. Brain shrugs, not looking up from his dip. "They keep turning them over, but seem to have no trouble packing them in. Try this," the academic advises around a mouthfull, indicating a bowl. "It's green."
Lex graciously declines. "So, have you heard any more movement on the-" he looks over his shoulder; "... 'special' front?"
"No, I don't believe I've heard anything interesting on the... " Brian theatrically looks over one shoulder, then the other; "... 'special' front." The two conversate some more, each obviously out to get something without having to give something.
Feeling he's essentially getting nowhere in this game of cat and mouse, Brian decides to just throw it out there amongst the dips and laughing children and granite glinting in the sun.
"Well, actually that 'special person', before they had a 'final conversation' with Candy, they mentioned a ... Lex, I won't lie to you, they mentioned..." his voice drops a little; "... 'treasure hunt'."
Lex digests this information, along with his bread and extra virgin olive oil. "Hmm, 'treasure hunt', you say?"
"Could mean something, could mean nothing at all," Brian shrugs, not meetign Lex's eye. "I'm not aware of the-" his thumb jerks upwards and his voice drops to a stage whisper, "... 'stars being right'." He looks off into the middle distance while idly jabing a breakstick into some pesto. "Mmmm, maybe check your almanac," he advises.

The builders crash around upstairs at the Stevens-Knight househild, glibly writing off the odd breakage as being covered by insurance. We follow the to-ings and fro-ings of furnature, scaffolding and planks of wood around the bustling workpeople to find Candy on her own in the smaller lounge, looking fed up with it all. Ducking under a length of two-by-four, Meryll enters the room.
"With all the noise, do you want to go somewhere? Maybe get a sundae?"
Candy unsuccessfully stifles a laugh, then sees how much Meryll is hoping she'll agree.
"The builders say they'll be done by tomorrow," Meryll continues. "How are you sleeping?"
Candy runs a hand through her hair. "That darn owl keeps coming back when it thinks I'm asleep!"
There is thunderous syncopated hammering from overhead, and something crashes and tinkles. Meryll shudders and the Slayer concedes defeat. "I'll get my shoes."
Later, at Exeter's premiere dairy product stop "La Glace House", a war of ice cream escalation has lead to defeat for both parties. Candy groans. "We SO should have just bought one and split it-!"
Meryll asks about the scene at the gallery caused by the giant portrait. "I wish I'd seen this photo that everyone's taling about."
"Everyone?! Candy squeaks.
Meryll shrugs. "Well, the neighbours, and someone at the supermarket... Apparently, it was quite 'super-sized'."
Candy's eyes bug out in a strange yet compelling visual. "It was as big as a house!"
Meryll cocks her head to one side, her trademark 'concerned' pose. "So you weren't expecting it?"
Candy shakes her head. "Not at the exhibition! It's disconcerting!" She sighs. "I don't know how models do it..."
"Well, it's good that you had a taste, a taste of what it is to be a model." Meryll pats her daughter's hand comfortingly. "You'll be back in your own room, soon."
Candy nods, idly tracing patterns in her sundae dish with her spoon. She looks up. "Have you got a new frame for the family portrait? Long as it's not, y'know... 'weird'."
Meryll shifts in her seat. A forgotten fifties hit plays in the background. "I haven't gotten around to it. Actually, I thought it would be bad luck to put it up again."
The Slayer shrugs, her metabolism already taking the edge off all the sugar. "As long as it's not in the same place..."
Meryll nods absently. Suddenly, her shoulders sag and she looks very small. "I'm not good at this," she admits with a nervous smile.
It's Candy's turn to be supportive. "It was quiet for a while..." Having tasted normalacy, and then having it torn away again made the loss all the more jagged, a taste as sweet and fleeting as the ice cream she's just eaten.
"It'll be quiet again, I'm sure," Meryll nods, her teeth flashing briefly in a wan grin.
In a effort to keep the conversation going, Candy mentions she ran into that nice young man, Josh. Meryll nods in sage understanding to highlight to her daughter that she's a good listener.
"Is there anything on your mind? You're quiet."
"I'm good." There's something of a pause. Candy looks up at her mother. "Can I have your last marshmallow?"
At last Meryll really grins, and Candy's eyes twinkle as she enjoys the final marshmallow. Try as she might, when Meryll looks at her, all she sees is her sweet little girl, not some freelance vampire killer.

Saturday night's all right for movies. Amidst a crowd of Exeterians, Candy and Cass emerge from the latest generic rom-com. Zak and Cynth are standing nearby. Cynth sees a couple of randoms who are apparently waiting for someone, or the next movie screening. The large besuited gentlemen are practically identical, and remind her of that old movie with that guy from "Animal House" and that lanky guy who was one of the original Ghostbusters. The two men fidgit as they loiter with intent to wait. One of them readjusts his belt and mechanically straightens his jacket, giving the young emo muso a glimpse of...
... was that a pistol in his belt?
"Oh, you're here." Startled, Cynth turns to see Cass and Candy.
"So, how was the latest generic rom-com?" Cynth asks.
"Oh, it was just terrible," comes a small, female voice from behind Cass and Candy. The group parts to reveal a small thin woman aged between 25 and 30 with mousy hair, dressed in what Cass would euphemistically term 'earth tones'. "Didn't you think so? I don't know why I watch movies like that."
"Oh, I don't know it was that bad," Candy opines, scoping this random. She looks like Renee Zelwegger bent beneath the weight of the world and dragged backwards through a hedge. The woman looks past them, towards the two gorillas.
"Well, it looks like Mr Madsen's waiting for me. Yes sir, he sure doesn't like to be kept waiting..." She nods goodbye to the group, and approaches the two large gentlemen. One of the 'Blues Brothers' grabs her shoulder, thrusting his beaten face into hers and snarling apparent threats under his bad breath. The young woman is bundled into a nearby nondescript car; the quartet watches as it drives away. The Slayer struggles for meaning. "Was that Madsen's mom?"
Cass shrugs. "His girlfriend...?"
"Maybe it was his aunt," Candy guesses.
Cynth shakes her head, over the mini-mystery. "Hey, let's go get some coffee... Irish coffee."

Back at the Stevens-Knight household, Brian and Meryll sit on the sofa, watching a DVD. Actually, they're talking to one another about their concerns for the children. Brian's phone rings. He can just make out the hushed voice of Nick Madsen, of all people. Nick fearfully tells him that whatever had Lex's so worried has just walked in the door: there are people in the house, with guns. Brian tries to get as much information from Nick as he can before the young man has to hang up. Brian sighs, his thumb stabbing the combo for Candy's number. Meryll is worried about another impending 'Charge of the Light Brigade' moment. "What's going on?" she asks.
Brian clenches his fist. "It's time to take out the trash!"

ACT III
Everyone who wants to be anyone is in the Trinity come ten o'clock. There's a lot of underage patrons, running the gauntlet of watered-down drinks and a guest DJ who at any second could spin "Head Like A Hole". Cynth tries to get Zak to slip Black Orchid's demo tape to the barman so they can get the jump on their chief rivals, Snakes In A Band. Horrifyingly, Alistair on the dancefloor, trying to bust a move with none other than mace-carrier Clarise. The young femme fatale is so impressed with the white boy's moves, she's txting on her RAZR.
Troy lurks nearby, largely unseen in the dim, garish lighting.
A drunken random lurches into view, trying to focus on Cass. "Hey, can I buy you a drink?!"
"Yes," Cass replies evenly.
"Can we go now?" Zak asks, fidgeting violently. Candy's phone rings; she answers it, and tries to convince Brian she's anywhere other than a bar. She goes to the bathroom, where Brian fills her in. He points out that though they don't owe Madsen the time of day, anything that has him worried is going to come after them at some point. He asks her to round up the troops and rendevous with him. Candy goes to do so, but finds Zak conspicuous by his absence.
Candy checks outside, and sees him marching off into the night. She runs to catch up to him, trying to get him to come along with them. Her step-brother is not interested at all: "I'm going home!" he nearly explodes, storming away. Candy shakes her head, but has to let him go - duty's calling again. She brings Cass and Cynth up to speed on the situation.

The crew meets up out of sight of the Madsen house. Brian is concerned at Zak's behaviour, but recognises he'll have to deal with his wayward son later. The academic suggests that he run distraction, going right up to the front door and making himself as visible as possible, giving Candy the oppertunity to sneak around the back. Cynth and the girl-whose-name-he-can't remmber will stay out of the line of fire, keeping the engine running. He notes they have an hour before Brian's contact on the police sends in the troops. They agree to the plan. Cynth drives herself, Brian and Cass up to the front door. The academic pulls himself from the car and walks towards the main door.
A mean-looking gent appears at an upstairs window, glaring down at the visitor. Brian cheerfully waves and deliberately mis-interprets his gestures as an invitation to proceed. A similar man opens the door, barring Brian's way and gruffly ordering him to leave. Brian bluffs he has an appointment with Lex, and politely won't take no for an answer. The doorman grows increasingly frustrated. In the background, he catches a glimpse of Lex in conference with a thin man.
"I don't think much of your help, Lex!" he calls over the thug's shoulder. "We have an appointment and I intend to keep it."
"That's it!" the thug growls, and Brian finds himself staring at the wrong end of a nickel-plated forty-five.
He gulps, raising his hands nice and slow. "On the other hand, no-one likes a buttinski...!"
Meanwhile, Candy has made it round the back of the house. She spots an open window on the second floor, and goes for it; using her Slayer skills, she makes an impossible leap upwards, shinnies up a drainpipe and squeezes through the window. She's in a small, darkened room. Movement makes the Slayer tense for action. Under a table, she finds Nick and Petra cowering. The door leading to the dining room is partly open. She can faintly hear raised voices from downstairs.
Meanwhile, downstairs, Brian continues to draw the attention of the doorman (Rex). He can see two such thugs, and a bored-looking thin man with a thin tie.
Upstairs, Candy tries to get Nick and Petra to make a break for it, but Nick's adamant they can't move because there's a guy in the corridor. As far as he can tell, the intruders have been trying to force his father to sign an agreement of sorts. Candy sneaks down the hallway.
In the drawing room, the thin man scratches the back of his neck. Though slightly ragged in an expensive shirt with rolled-up sleeves, top button undone and thin silk tie askew, his dark eyes pierce into the magnate seated in an antique chair. "You're talking around the point, Madsen. Are you gonna sign?"
Lex sets his jaw firmly. "You've got nothing to offer me."
The man's thin, pinched face registers boredom at Lex's reticence. "You're making a mistake. My boss isn't the sort of guy you want to cross, you know? You should be flattered he's taken such an interest in you. He wants you to be his agent 'on the floor'."
Across the room, a familiar young woman sits curled up on a chair, chewing on a strand of hair. "Shall I do it now?"
The man runs a hand over his pinched face, sighs, then shrugs. "Yeah, why not?" He snaps his fingers.
The woman jumps from her seat and throws her arms out at Lex, fingers spread wide. Energy crackles through the room an instant before Lex shouts in surprise and pain - he's almost snapped in half backwards, jerked to his feet, head thrown back. With every muscle in his neck taunt, mouth locked open in a silent scream... a snake's head appears with a loud hiss. Its impossibly long body extends itself upwards, writhing horribly.

ACT IV
Lex is nearly broken on a rack of witch-energy. Muscles flex like steel cable beneath its scales as the snake curls around and stabs its fangs into Lex's neck; the fangs penetrate the businessman's flesh like knives through rice paper. Mr Thin Tie has a finger against his pursed lips as he watches. His expression barely changes as a young woman leaps into the room, uttering her Xena-like cry of "Karate chop action!" A knife-edge of a hand thwacks meatily against the snake, forcing it to release Madsen.
Abruptly, the witch-energy web ceases. Shaking itself, the reptile meanacingly draws itself up to its full height, ducking to fit beneath the ceiling. Candy sizes up her latest monster opponent. Madsen slowly sits back down in the chair, an impassive monarch with a giant snake stretching upwards from his throat.
"Come on, what is this?" Thin Tie breaks his silence. "Well, it's-it's interesting, I'll give you that," he concedes.
At the estate's main entrance, Brian raises both hands at the guard in a concilatory gesture, the better to crack his cane across the bridge of his (Rex's) nose. Through the pain, the bruiser's eyes water and his hands fly to his face instinctively. Brain carefully steps foward.
Inside, Thin Tie shifts his weight from foot to foot as he regards the young woman. "So... what's your name, huh?" The Slayer ignores him, eyeballing the snake. "You know, you're causin' trouble," he chides.
"No, I'm finishing your trouble," she says firmly. Her gaze is fixed on the snake as it sways from side to side above her, tasting the air for her body heat. Suddenly, she darts at the man - to be pulled up short by a Colt automatic in her face.
"You small town types're so cute." Mr Thin Tie smiles crookedly at the frustrated Slayer over the pistol's gunsights. "Now, how 'bout we start over?"
Outside, another bruiser suddenly returns from foot patrol and gets the drop on Brian. At least, he would have, had not Cynth and Cass both "sacked" him as soon as he got near the entrance. He gamely fights back against the surprise attack, but can't seem to get the emo chick and fashionista off his legs. He struggles to make it to a side door and closes it on the two young women. At least, he would have, had he not gone down in a heap and been stamped on by a worn Converse sneaker. "Ow! My head!"
Inside Langbourne, the young witch steps forward. "Plan B?"
Thin Tie seems to consider it, watching Candy like a hawk as the snake waits in the background. Candy studies him for any signs of weakness, but all she sees is a human poised to strike just like the snake. The man's thin lips twitch. "Yeah."
The witch squeaks joyfully and jumps. She turns to the snake, stretching her arms out. "Snakey," she commands imperially, "go get Madsen's son!" Candy starts, and twists to see the snake dive down from under the ceiling towards the floor. Madsen coughs loudly once as the snake leaves him; its long body slithers away towards the kitchen on its deadly mission.
Outside the front door, Brian grabs the guard's wrist, forcing his gun upwards. Brian's cane taps the tiles between Rex's feet, before darting upwards to strike the unfortunate bruiser in a delicate location, neatly parting his little goombattas. Rex crumples nicely, leaving Brian with the automatic.
Inside, Candy uses her Slayer speed to drop down and swing her leg at her enemy's feet, but Thin Tie jumps back against the wall to avoid. His crooked smile gone, he brings his weapon to bear again - but she's not there.
Meanwhile, the other guard's size and adrenaline surge are proving difficult to overcome for the young women. It's a tangle of denim, silk and polyester blend, a maelstrom of flailing limbs, a scrum without a ball.
The kitchen door is bashed open as a reptile head slithers into view, forked tonge flittering. It looks like it'll move on... but then senses somehing, it's jaws part and it hisses louder than possible. Nick and Petra pop up from behind the central counter, both screaming in fright. The snake tastes their delicious bodyheat on the wind and rears to strike, fangs sliding wetly into view from their sheaths-
"RUN!"
Candy's shout shocks Nick into action. He jumps foward directly into danger, waving his arms. "Hey! Snake! Over here!" The slimy maw swings towards him, reacting to the closer heat source. "Petra, run!" he yells. She wastes no time in rabbiting out the back door, no mean feat in those heels and that (flattering) dress.
Madsen's tongue lolls around in his aching mouth, trying to shift the unique taste of reptile scales from his saliva. Thin Tie turns his attention back to the broken businessman, stepping forward confidently. Madsen raises his head, bringing Thin Tie up short. "You made a mistake," Madsen says carefully. Slowly, deliberately, he pushes himself up from the ornate chair. "You thought you were here to talk business." Thin Tie squints at Madesen's face, then starts as a thick shadow billows wetly over Madsen's already-dark eyes.
Mr Thin Tie shifts his grip on his pistol (which increasingly feels more like a lump of metal than leverage) and nervously licks his lips. "Call off your monster here, Madsen," he orders, jerking his head at the Slayer.
"Hey!" Candy scowls. She bolts after the snake, leaving the man, witch and Madesen to sort it out between themselves.
Outside, the grass is being churned to mud by the epic struggle between Cass, Cynth and the remaining guard. Neither side can gain purchase: he's just too strong, and they're just too determined. Suddenly, with a final burst of Gen Y zeal, the young women clamber over the gaurd and slam the side door on him.
Petra runs breathlessly though the Exeter night, thin fingers clawing a the dark air as she catapults herself away from that crazy house and that giant snake. Nick throws himself through the kitchen door and into the clear, precisely in time for the snake to dive down from above with its dislocated jaws wide. Nick has just enough time to realise he's not alone before the wet darkness descends on him, constricting and enveloping him.
The snake works its way down the terified teen preternaturally quickly; too soon, Lex the Younger is nothing more than a boy-sized bulge inside a big snake.
"Not on my watch!" A shoe stamps down on the "tail end" of the snake, and the wedge-head jerks around to face this annoyance, slitted eyes baleful and tounge darting at the Slayer.
In the hallway inside the main entrance of the Langbourne Estate, Brian advances towards the lit room where the action is. Cass and Cynth follow behind. A well-dressed thug suddenly steps forward from nowhere, pistol swinging upwards towards them. Brian takes one step forwards and stabs his gun's barrel at the guard's face. Already in a bad mood, he has no problems 'unleashing the beast'. "On the floor! NOW!" Terrified, the guard drops to his knees like Saul on the road to Damascus. "Cass, get the gun." Momentarily shocked that Brian remembered her name, Cass nevertheless stamps an impeccable heel on the guard's gun, drawing it away from him. In the next room, Thin Tie flashes that crooked smile again. He waves his pistol absently at Madsen. "Nice trick, Lex. But I've got our witch here to suck all that pesky good out of you, so when we're doing business, we're not dealing with any sanctimonious garbage, we've just got pure Lex Madsen." The smile disappears and his narrow eyes grow cold. "So sign the damn document or we kill your kid."
It's Madsen's turn to smile crookedly. "Oh, no. That's what you thought you were doing." His head twitches slightly as he speaks. "The truth is that you've bitten off more than you can chew." His tone is even and clear, and somewhow that's more un-nerving than the pitch black eyes.
Barreling through the estate kitchen like a juggernaut, Candy grabs a knife block as she passes. She explodes through the kitchen door to the outside. Taking in the situation at a glance (giant snake with suspiciously teenager-sized bump) she attacks, hurling kitchen knives inneffectually at the non-occupied parts of the bloated reptile.
In the Estate hallway, Brian, Cass and Cynth stand over the cowed guard. "Tie him up," Brian instucts the two young women. "Use that hanging." He indicates an ornate rug hanging on the hallway wall. Cynth retrieves the hanging; Cass starts to unbuckle her expensive belt, then hesitates. "I'll buy you another...!" Brian growls. Cass seems to accept this and continues, and presently the guard is rolled up in the rug like an oversized novelty cigar, secured with Cass' belt.
"Hey, I've got an idea how we can turn things around," Cynth announces. "Remember how those punk vampires attacked you house?"
Brian's brain works furiously, then realisation dawns. "...Oh."
Outside, Petra's foot comes down wrong on a lumpy piece of turf and her ankle twists out cruelly beneath her, depositing her in a well-dressed, sweaty heap. She sobs and cries out as she tries to regain her footing. A loud hiss makes Petra's hot breath catch in her throat and she looks up, way up, to see a hideous bloated reptile towering over her, silhouetted against the moon. Its mouth opens as it rears to strike down on the helpless female... when a solid wooden knife block splats off its head. Hissing, the snake turns to face the Slayer, again.
Inside the house, Brian enters the large lit room and sneaks up on the man nonchalantly waving a pistol at Madsen. He jabs his pistol in the small of the man's back and places his mouth close to the suddenly tense man's ear. "I know what you're thinking. Did he leave the safety on or not?"
"You are about to find out that you do not mess with the Madsens."
Brian notices Lex's voice sounds a little different: lower? More measured? "Hello, Lex, I-eeeyargh-!" Brian starts, finally looking at Lex and seeing the magnate's inkwell eyes. Also rather disconcertingly, there appear to be a number of thick black veins in his neck, slowly spreading.
Outside, the snake rears back and lunges full bore for Candy, jaws wide to recieve her. Breaking out the Slayer fu, Candy draws her sword, spins to avoid the fangs and beatly decapitates the reptile in one smooth motion. "No head for you!" The snake's momentum carries its head away into the darkness, where it lands with a 'thud'. Candy turns back to the main body of the snake as the scales stretch, discolour and seem to simply melt away. In the middle of the ensuing puddle of ectoplasm, a tense Nick lays in a foetal position, staring out at a world he thought he'd never see again. "Hunh," is all he can manage. Blinking the slime away, he focuses on Candy. "Is Petra okay?"
She seems hurt by his question, and glances down. "She's over there. I need to go check on the others." She rushes back to the house. Just before the young Slayer enters, she glances over her shoulder at Nick;
a tear glistens on her cheek in the cold moonlight, like a diamond on china... then she goes inside.
Nick awkwardly approaches Petra and helps her to her feet. She looks up at her would-be knight in slimy Armani. "You told me your Dad was a bit weird, but...!" She shakes her head. Nick brushes away a strand of hair stuck to her forehead by grime. They hobble back towards the Estate.
Candy enters the drawing room. Mr Thin Tie sees the slime on the sword and takes it as the writing on the wall. He slowly spreads his hands and tosses his pistol on top of his jacket. "That's it, Madsen. It's over between us."
Brian notices the mousy woman's gaze darting between the man and Madsen, and makes a guess. "Call off the witch." The man waves his fingers at the woman, and she backs down.
He chuckles slightly. "C'mon, we're leaving." Carefully, he gathers up his jacket and pistol and turns to go. "I'd watch your back, if I were you, Lexy-boy," he nonchalantly advises over his shoulder. "I know you've made enemies before, but this one-" he shakes his head. "You're gonna be broken into pieces so small the worms won't even have to chew!" He smiles that crooked smile once more, glares at Brian and Candy, and exits the room without looking back. The young woman follows closely. There's a noticeable easing of tension in the room. Madsen's faces twitches as his teeth clench; he pushes down from his shoulders. The blackness in his eyes washes away like clouds parting, and the black veins slowly recede into nothingness. He blinks and looks around, past Brian into the hallway- and starts. "Yargh!"
Brian and Candy whirl around. Cynth stands there, a flaming Molotov cocktail in either hand. "Does anybody know how to switch these things off?!" Brian and she beat at the flames as Candy turns her attention to Madsen the Elder.
"Who was that woman?"
Madsen shrugs slowly. "I don't know who she was, but I know who she works for."
"Well, there's something wrong with her," Cass diagnoses, leaving Brian and Cynth to their fire-fighting duties. "I mean, who doesn't like Jennifer Aniston?"
"What does the boss do?" Candy asks.
Lex considers the question. "He has connections with... certain business interests. You might say he's a 'made man', with a few special abilties." He rubs his neck. "His name is Andreas Baxter. I advise you to avoid him."
"Thank you, we'll bear that in mind," Brian announces, returned from having kept the home fires from burning down the house. There is a short silence as people seem to be waiting for Madsen to say something. Finally, Brian glances at Candy. "Are are we done here?"
The Slayer looks the ungreatful magnate up and down. "Yeah," she nods, "we're done." They leave, finding the "carpeted" guard in the hallway gone. Cass retrieves her belt from a corner.
Outside, they find Nick and Petra standing there, shivering. Cass steps forward. "C'mon, Petra, I'll give you a ride home." She gently leads the shellshocked young woman away. Cynth and Brian go to retrieve the Stevens-mobile. This conveniently leaves Nick and Candy alone, and face to face. Candy tries to appear nonchalant, but her body language indicates otherwise.
Nick clears his throat. "Hey, thanks. I, unh, haven't seen you around much."
The Slayer shrugs. "I'm not around here much."
Nick nods, then looks intently at the young woman. "Candy, are you okay?"
She nods, glancing at her feet and shifting her weight. Candy crosses her arms. "This... this is what I do."
Nick smiles. "I've just been swallowed by a giant snake." He laughs nervously. "It's never boring with you...!" Candy either can't or won't meet his eye. She looks like she really doesn't want to be here. Glancing around, Nick sees Petra's tear-stained face as she looks over her shoulder. He goes over to her as she's about to get into Cynth's car, and gives his girlfriend a gallant peck on the cheek. Candy snorts in what seems like disgust. She goes to the Stevens-mobile and climbs into the shotgun position. Brian sits with his hands on the wheel, looking ahead. "Everything alright?"
Candy slouches in her seat. It'd be so much earlier if everybody just stopped asking her that-! "Yeah, whatever." It's clear she doesn't want to talk. Brian's expression shows that for better or worse, he's going to respect that. He sighs.
"You know, I think that one day..." he reaches for the ignition, and the engine sparks into life, beams shining out into the darkness. "...we'll actually get a 'thank you' out of the Madsens."
Candy snorts. "Don't hold your breath...!"
A smile tugs at the corner of Brian's mouth as he puts he car in gear and they ease forwards towards home, down the hill and out of sight, the sound of the engine fluttering away into the night. Candy's voice floats above the wind in the trees.
"Still can't believe he killed Gom...!"

Back at the Stevens-Knight household, the domestic tranquility of the kitchen is shattered (and potentially a few spice racks) as Zak burst through the back dor. Shocked, Meryll turns to face her stepson. "Are you alright? Where are the others?"
Zak flinches at he questions, fidgeting violently, and suddenly seems to snap. "Leave me alone!" he yells. He charges upstairs, Meryll's concerned upturned face follows Zak's footsteps thudding across the ceiling; she winces violently as his door slams. She leans against the counter and her hand comes up to cover her mouth, face screwed up in anguish.

Cass and Cynth drive on through the night.
"So, what's up with Nick and Candy?" Cass asks.
Cynth mentally chews the question over, turning it around in her mind. "Uhm, they almost went out, once" she shrugs. "And don't think it's the first time she's saved his life-!" She shivers as her mind flashes back to cabins in the woods and tentacle-headed monsters. Suddenly, she's back in the present. "Hey, let's go back to the club. After all, we need to get the demo tape Zak left behind!" The car swings around and heads off into a different part of the Exeter night.

At the Stevens-Knight house, Brian meets Meryll in the kitchen and brings her up to speed on the evening's proceedings. She notes Zak's increasingly pronounced anti-social behaviour. Brian notes how it's dfficult to be overly authoritarian towards one's biological child, and half-jokingly suggests they try a "criss-cross" approach, Meryll attempting to straighten out Zak and he working on Candy.
Meryll nods sagely. "I think we'll try your way a little longer."
"Meryll..." Brian glances downwards. When he looks up at his wife, his eyes are pleading and his voice is very small, devoid of authority or pomposity. "We're... good... parents... aren't we...?"
She smiles sadly. "Given the circumstances, yes." The parents hug and hold one another in the kitchen of their anything-but-normal household.

In the dead of night, Zak lies in his room, smiling blissfully.
Down the hall, Candy sits alone in her makeshift room with her arm laid on a towel. With her trusty sword, she carefully cuts one parallel line after another into her arm. The young woman flinches and gasps slightly with each precise incision. The cuts heal almost as soon as they're made, and leave no scar. Candy continues cutting, almost mechanically, alone with her ritual and her pain.

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER
MORGAN DAVIE

(Post credits sequence)
At the Langbourne estate, a thick wooden door swings open. Josh appears, an ancient dusty tome open in one hand. "Hello?" His voice reverbrates in the empty halls. "Something going on...?"

(C) SLAYERS EAST SEASON IV

EXECUTIVE PRODUCER: MORGAN DAVIE

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